As a trauma therapist, one of the main battles I help clients fight is the battle with their own mind.
Trauma can trick you into thinking that you’re not good enough, not doing enough, not worthy of good things. It will try to make you remember bad things and make you forget everything that’s great about you. Trauma is a liar. Fighting it is exhausting.
These books help clients reconnect with their strengths, give themselves kindness during hard times, and make space for growth into who they really want to be (not just who someone else expects them to be). I recommend them regularly in session and hope you’ll check them out. And remember, listening to the audiobook counts as reading!
(These are NOT affiliate links and I do not get any portion of the sales of these books. I just think they’re good!)
How to Keep House While Drowning, by K.C. Davis
When you’re in a triggered, depressive, or anxious state, cleaning and other basic tasks are often the last thing on your mind…until they overwhelm you.
Maybe you have one specific task you just can’t do no matter how hard you try. Maybe your whole life feels like a mess you could never clean up. Maybe you’re somewhere in the middle.
This book is a trauma-informed, neurodivergent-welcoming guide to helping you reclaim your environment.
You don’t have to repeat the abusive patterns you may have been taught just to get yourself back on track. You don’t have to bully yourself into “basic” tasks. Give this book a shot instead.
Laziness Does Not Exist, by Devon Price, PhD
According to Dr. Price, the lie of laziness goes something like this:
“Your worth is your productivity. You cannot trust your own feelings and limits. There is always more you could be doing.”
Now, if that sounds like your own inner monologue, their book will give you the strategies you need to embrace your needs and enjoy your rest. And it will do it in a way that respects the real challenges of life, without expecting you to have the power or resources to take a 2 year vacation whenever you’re a little tired.
Instead, you’ll get to explore what you actually need to and CAN do tomorrow to make life manageable. If you need to change your relationship with work and with people, so that you can feel grounded, this is the book for you.
Pure, by Linda Kay Klein
There is a particularly religious flavor of perfectionism that can be extra tough to manage.
If your harsh inner critic uses a lot of spiritual/religious language to put you down, Pure and books like it, is for you.
Recovery from trauma, especially childhood trauma, involves accepting that no one else can give or take away your value as a human, no matter what they did or said to you. And Pure examines one invention that survivors must navigate when trying to be “good enough”: purity culture.
To be clear, purity culture has permeated daily life in America for several decades, affecting the religious and the non-religious alike. Changing your relationship to the idea of religious purity will have a huge impact on your growth, and on your ability to give yourself permission to fully embrace yourself as you are.
I hope you’ll read or listen things that build up your confidence and kindness.
I offer therapy to help clients understand the source of their harsh inner critic. Then we deconstruct that voice and make room for a kinder, more useful way of thinking.
If that sounds interesting to you, you can inquire about my openings here: CONTACT ME.