Last month, I gave a short presentation to therapists about how to actually clear out the mental clutter and distraction to do the things we really want to do in life. (Yes, therapists struggle with this too!)
We briefly talked about the role of burnout and vicarious trauma on the brain, but we also talked about how to put ideas, projects, and your schedule together to serve you.
This information was detailed, but I think it missed an important aspect of the mental friction we all feel.
If you find yourself grinding to a halt when you try to follow through. If each daily choice takes more effort than you want it to, there are a couple things worth considering, including whether you are just distracted or whether you’re actually avoiding your own mind.
Is your Frustration Actually Due to Hypervigilance?
One of the most frustrating sources of mental friction is constantly being on guard. This is called being “hypervigilant.”
Hypervigilence means that your brain is always looking for danger, even when you are technically safe.
Being hypervigilant takes a lot of energy and makes you react quickly to things instead of responding calmly.
EMDR therapy helps you teach your body to relax when you are safe.
This is crucial if you went through something you can’t shake off.
But it also helps to be able to relax into your personal safety if you are surrounded by people you love but who are in a lot of pain.
Or think of how you feel when that one friend who “trauma dumps” when you’re not ready. Think of your patients who are recovering from gnarly injuries. And if you’re a therapist, think of how you feel after weeks and weeks of hearing the most stressful stories.
You will want the kind of treatment that can help your brain put invasive memories and stories in their proper place so they no longer take over your mind.
This frees up your mental energy to focus on what’s happening right in front of you!
As you quiet this mental noise, you’ll find it’s easier to focus, be present in conversations, and get things done.
Once you no longer need to ask yourself questions like:
Why can’t I follow through on my plans?
Why do I feel so exhausted all the time?
Why can’t I focus on work?
How can I stop second-guessing myself?
…life gets a lot smoother.
Now I do provide EMDR therapy, and you can use the CONTACT ME page to reach out and get started.
But let me give you a tip that you can use right now.
If you’re struggling with hypervigilance, the quickest thing you can do right now is to remind yourself where you are, why you’re there, and what age you are.
By remembering that you are:
- In a safe(-enough) environment,
- Focused on the task at hand, and
- An actual, grown adult,
You allow yourself to tap into the strengths you have in that moment to address whatever might be triggering you or stressing you.
Here’s an example:
If you’re hypervigilant in hospitals because you had a traumatic experience there, your internal dialogue can sound something like this:
(1) “I’m at the hospital but I’m just in the pharmacy, which will not cause my body pain. (2) I am here to pick up my Granny’s prescriptions for her. (3) I am a grown-ass woman…and when I get back to her place I’m going to ask for her pharmacy login so we can have these mailed to her house.”
Pair this with something in your pockets that you can play with, some butterfly tapping, or a few deep breaths and you’re back in the present, handling your business.
If you’re tired of the constant internal back and forth of trying to drag yourself into real life, therapy can make all the difference. I invite you to explore a personalized and body-aware approach like EMDR. You can CONTACT ME directly to get started.